the radio silence wasnt even newsworthy until just now.
because i didnt feel it till now
and its realer and realer
cant think past it now, because now i think im alone within me
and cant face you alone anymore

So you've already heard it's unlikely but possible I might be pregnant... the thought gives me surges of happiness i cant even describe. Its like a cereal commercial... "good source of wonder and part of a completely new direction." I like the idea of a secret baby. I want to see how long I can pull that off, if its true. I want to have fun with this.

I'd be the worst preggster you ever had to deal with. I'd bank on everyones begrudging support, lean on the government, I'd go out with JC and maybe do stuff... then let him believe it was his. All kinds of fun.

And who should I give paternity to? That's a fun one. I always said I'd give it to the clonewarrior, but he repulses me now. Then again it could be fun. Don't know how much i favor the name of eskimopoison. Wonder if I can pick up a person with a cool last name and blame paternity on them. How about Che?! AHAHAHAHAHAHA

We'd have fun, you and I.

depression is kinda fun. Not the "mopey sad" depression, the Flatline Depression. You dont care, and therefore cannot be sad either. You care for nothing! Ahahaha....

Things you would normally not say (because they're inappropriate or desperately lacking tact) you will actually say. And life is better because of it.

Life is better when it holds no meaning. But give me semilla, and it will burst into colors and actually feel like something when you run your hand across its soul.

stomach ache chills kills happy makes it bled and sad makes me hope
never feared the sight of blod till is aw you and me and baaaaabyeblyue

You can change your mind but you can't change mine.